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Strange and laughable adventures for all ages. A pirate crew is hijacked by a haunted bowling alley. A robot disastrously attends Mardi Gras. Armed only with honesty, a trout saves lives on the Mississippi. The Easter Bunny gets worn out. George Washington eats a breakfast fit for champions. A cyclops outwits a sinister sheep-eating monster. A dog bites a vacuum cleaner hose. Bigfoot gets a dog that lays eggs. A bear gets hungry enough to eat a vampire,...
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What happens when a Southern, conservative developer is convicted of a white-collar crime and forced to work with liberal, charitable volunteers building houses for the under-privileged? James T. Curtis answers this question in "Lewis Grizzard Is Dead and I Don't Feel So Good Myself", a candid blend of memoir and political treatise that describes what happens when right-wing and left-wing ideologies collide amidst lumber, hammers, and nails. In the...
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Cats are complex creatures and humans could learn a lot from the fickle and aloof way the feline mind works. Cat lovers will enjoy this and cat haters will have all their fears confirmed-your cat is smarter than you, is better than you, and is plotting something sinister. Includes illustrations. People say, a thousand years ago cats were worshipped as gods. That implies this is no longer the case. Aren't people CUTE when they're in denial? Cats may...
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Forget about Ann Landers and Dear Abby. Tammy deals with real problems and doesn't give a rip if your mother-in-law is a nosy know-it-all or if you're unsure where to seat the second wives at your daughter's wedding. That's all crap. Tammy deals with real problems like: 1. What should you wear to your parole hearing? 2. How come lite beer weighs the same as regular beer? 3. IS a dog's mouth really cleaner than a human's? 4. Is "Gator" a good name...
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There are three main plots in "Billy Graham in Heaven." Each has its own character developments and its own sci-fi innovations that are scientifically predictable, yet magically enchanting. All intertwine seamlessly to provide a rollicking and profound read. The plot advertised by the title involves a respectfully presented, Heaven-dwelling Billy Graham. Turns out that Heaven's souls mostly just hang out, being conscious or not if they wished, or...
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We must inform, engage, and activate all Americans to vote! Critical thinking needs to endure if the US is to survive. We must think America great again, because critical thinking leads to action! Janie Johnson's Think America Great teaches and engages anyone who wants to think and clearly express the ideas that make America great. Conservative principles have made America great and will continue to keep America great! Think America Great provides...
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In a world with video games,alcohol,and sex. How would a caveman react? Rex is a ruthless, unapologetic, and spontaneous male who goes through life with basic male needs of this modern day age. With ups and downs between different women and adventures with his close friends, Rex tries to figure out the next best thing. Most men can say that they themselves are modern day cavemen.
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If You Could Read My Voice is a compilation of the best pieces from Mark Daniel Curley's nighttime AM radio show, SportstatiC, from the year 1998. This compilation was originally written and printed, in a very limited but unpublished run, in early 1999. The content has been preserved in its original state for this e-book, from Preface to Table of Contents to Main Text to Index. This was Mark Daniel Curley's first crack at professional writing, and...
29) Chirper in Chief
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Chirper in Chief is a political satire about Trump's presidency. The book briefly depicts Trump making his grand entrance on the political scene. Readers are informed about Trump defeating his political opponents thus becoming the frontrunner of the GOP and later President of the United States of America. The book also portrays Trump's controversial campaign ties with Russia and his obsession with tweeting. Readers are also enlightened of his disdain...
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Did you ever look at the clouds in the sky and notice the bumper stickers God has pasted on them to try and get our attention? Bumper Stickers on the Clouds presents some of the signs you may have missed. The essays and humorous stories included within will help you to relax, laugh, and provide some new perspectives on your Christian journey. Bible references and the re-telling of Bible stories and verses assist in furthering the understanding and...
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Dogs don't eat as much kids, don't ask for money, are easier to train, and usually come when you call them. They don't need a fortune for college, and if they get pregnant, you can sell their offspring. If you are lonely or lack self-esteem, get a dog. Dogs are always pleased to see you, want to be by your side, and stare at you for no reason. That's love. They're loyal, friendly, forgiving, and make you laugh. They protect your family and your property,...
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When I was preparing my first book for publication, I kept reading and hearing from the "experts" that every author ought to have a blog. I was a bit queasy about diving into such an undertaking. My unease was caused by my constant desire to be somewhat consistent (if not first-rate). I didn't want to be one of those guys and gals who only blogged every few weeks when the spirit moved them.
After much prayer and consternation, I opted to follow the...
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Everyone who knows cats think they're so special.
But how can they explain why to mere humans?
Where do cats get their sense of superiority? How do they manipulate us so easily? “Cat-echisms” answers these eternal feline questions in an easy question-and-answer form. The result? A privileged peek inside the feline brain. In the process, cat owners-and even those who admire cats from afar-are entertained as well as enlightened. Fully illustrated...
35) The Fart Tootorial: Farting Fundamentals, Master Blaster Techniques, and the Complete Toot Taxonomy
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From the authors of The Book of Beer Pong and The Book of Beer Awesomeness, this illuminating and hilarious volume features everything a person could ever wish to know (and more!) about everyone's favorite bodily function. It's loaded with interesting information, from the history of farts to different types of flatulence ("Much like a fingerprint, no two farts sound-or smell-alike"). Also featuring the best fart techniques, defenses, and pranks,...
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While doing research for a family tree, author Lou Schafer surveyed thousands of headstones across the United States and overseas and amassed a unique collection of, often unintentionally, humorous epitaphs. Along with gravestone inscriptions, this book also includes historical information to give the epitaphs more context. Each chapter highlights traditional death customs, eccentric illustrations as well as numerous bizarre, vengeful, rude and funny...
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These stories are a collection of true and nearly true adventures of many different cats. They are tales of things that I have witnessed with my own two eyes. They are stories that have been told to me, and they are stories derived from a deeply deranged mind due to all the catnip abuse I had been subjected to by having cats as friends. Iggy was a real cat, but he belonged to my sister Loretta, not to my wife and me. Our cats were Cheech and Chong....
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Small Print is a book that tells part of the Bible story and gives important details that can be missed from the author's point of view. This book is a collection of Bible-based stories that will make you laugh out loud.
The "For Sale" story will offer you the fantasy that cost you only thirty pieces of silver. "What's in a Name" will check your attitude when you see a beggar. "Can Opener or Cross" is about a boy running from a girl, a plus sign,...
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